Weird Pregnancy Milestone # 372 and associated wardrobe changes
It's official. My tummy has grown enough to stick out farther than my boobs. So now, not only do I waddle, I waddle while leading with my not actually all that huge and distended stomach. Joy.

To celebrate the occasion, I ordered some maternity tops online today. (Actually mostly done since all of my clothes seem to have become quite unflattering overnight.) I'd pretty much already outgrown all but the baggiest of my pre-pregnancy pants and skirts, but It's apparently time to retire my regular shirts as well. They're all too short so the tummy panel on maternity pants and stuff shows, plus, you know, they're getting kind of tight across the middle.

And, also, I now know why women wear those stupid "baby on board" shirts. It's not 'cause anyone actually likes those things (I sincerely hope not anyway, or else I've totally just started some sort of maternity wear wank); it's cause they're a way to tell the world that "no, I'm not fat, god damn it! I'm pregnant!"

I mean, while it's exciting 'cause hey, that's my baby growing in there, it's also kind of not 'cause I've spent my whole life having an expanding waistline be a bad thing and that's tough to turn off. Which, of course, makes me feel like the shallowest human being alive because why can't I just be happy with the physical representation of the miracle of life that's growing inside me (or whatever bullshit those serene pregnant ladies think) instead of having some sort of fucked up battle with my self about whether we'll flaunt the bulge or hide it every time I leave the house?

So yes. Baby = yay! Feeling like a the fattest (and shallowest!) of all fat walruses = not so much.

Oh... but new clothes also = yay! so I think maybe I'll call this one a win.